


Darcy Lewis: Asgardian Wrangler

by FrenchKey, JayofOlympus



Series: Ladies of Marvel Bingo 2019 [1]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: BAMF Darcy Lewis, Darcy Lewis is the Asgardian Wrangler, Darcy Lewis-centric, Darcy is smart, Drunkenness, F/M, Gen, Meet the Family, Platonic Affection, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Kissing, Politics, Spa Day, Team Dinners, Team as Family, cocktails
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:28:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23691628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrenchKey/pseuds/FrenchKey, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayofOlympus/pseuds/JayofOlympus
Summary: How Darcy earned her title.
Relationships: Asgardians & Darcy Lewis, Avengers Team Friendship - Relationship, Darcy Lewis & Thor, Jane Foster & Darcy Lewis, Jane Foster/Thor
Series: Ladies of Marvel Bingo 2019 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1706140
Comments: 2
Kudos: 105
Collections: Ladies of Marvel Bingo 2019





	Darcy Lewis: Asgardian Wrangler

**Author's Note:**

> This is our fill for M5 - Darcy Lewis in the Ladies of Marvel bingo. We both both think she's a total badass and deserves to get to show that. We have planned several more chapters of this for the future :) Enjoy!
> 
> (Neither of us knows anything about American politics or a political studies degree so we made some stuff up. Please ignore any mistakes.)
> 
> Many thanks are due to Kaity and Loki, god of Mistakes for the beta! Thanks guys :)

_Thor_

‘My friends, I must retire,’ Thor said, pushing his chair back from the table. ‘My thanks for the wonderful meal, shieldbrother.’

He grinned at Clint, who had cooked the giant pot of chili for team dinner. Clint shot him a thumbs up in response. Thor stood and paused to press a kiss to Clint’s forehead before he left the room, waving and smiling at everyone else.

Clint blinked after him, then turned to Jane.

‘Your boyfriend is the best,’ he said. ‘He compliments my food and gives forehead kisses. I love him.’

Jane nodded and beside her Darcy grinned. ‘Forehead kisses are the best!’ she said with a nod. ‘Besides the bear hugs. Damn that man can hug.’

‘Does he do that to everyone?’ Bruce asked quietly, rubbing his glasses on his shirt.

‘Most people,’ Darcy nodded, ‘But he probably won’t do it to you. He’s big and blonde, but he’s not dumb. He’s noticed you don’t like physical contact. He’s more likely to just give you compliments.’

‘Is this an Asgardian thing?’ Tony asked. ‘Or is it a Thor thing? I can never tell. He definitely didn’t pick it up down here. Has anyone told him people don’t really do that around here?’

Darcy shot him a glare. ‘It doesn’t matter if it’s a him thing or an Asgardian thing, and if you say anything to him that makes him stop doing it, you’ll have me to answer to,’ she said, waving her fork threateningly.

Tony raised his hands, ‘I just don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea about him!’ he said.

Darcy growled and began to reach for her knife. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ she asked, pointing it mock-threateningly in his direction.

‘Yeah dude, not cool,’ Clint said, deadpan as he shovelled more chilli into his mouth. ‘I think you need more forehead kisses in your life. I’m with Thor on this one. Casual affection is the best.’

‘I didn’t say it… You know what, I’ll be in my lab,’ Tony said, throwing his hands up and leaving the table.

‘So, Clint, Thor was right,’ Jane said, ignoring Tony’s departure, ‘The food was delicious. Thank you for cooking tonight. You’ll have to give me the recipe.’

Clint grinned, pleased by the constant praise. ‘Sure! But keep in mind you’ll need to scale it way down; my recipe is tailored for feeding half an army, which comes in handy here, but probably won’t be much use for just two or three of you.’

‘I guess I’ll have to half it for us and Thor then?’ Jane said, turning to Darcy.

‘Yeah, sounds about right. That man can _eat_ ’ Darcy replied.

‘His metabolism is so different from that of a human,’ Jane said. ‘It’s astounding.’

Darcy shook her head. ‘Nuh-uh, we’re not going to science land in the middle of dinner,’ she said. ‘Eat your chilli and you can gush about your alien boyfriend’s weird biology later.’

Jane grumbled but turned back to her food. Darcy did her best not to catch Clint’s eye as he doubled over laughing at her comment.

* * *

_Volstagg_

JARVIS announcing an arrival on the balcony was a little unexpected, given that Thor and Jane weren’t expected to be back from their date until after dinner. Darcy spotted a couple of the Avengers grabbing weapons when they all stood to answer JARVIS.

Clint motioned for Darcy to stay inside, but she ignored him, following the group.

‘I seek Thor,’ a loud voice announced, and Darcy pushed forward to get to the front of the group.

‘Volume, man,’ she said. ‘Hey Volstagg, we gotta work on volume control. Thor’s on a date, and he won’t be back for a while, so unless it’s an emergency, you’d better just hang out until he gets back.’

‘Ah! The Lady Darcy!’ Volstagg said cheerily, arms thrown wide. ‘It is good to see you, friend.’

‘Still not a Lady,’ Darcy grumbled, but she was grinning as she stepped into his arms and let him squeeze her in a tight hug. ‘It’s good to see you too, Big Guy,’ she said into his beard. ‘How’re things back home?’

‘All is well, my friend,’ Volstagg assured her, a massive grin on his face, so big that even his giant beard couldn’t hide it. ‘I have simply come to deliver a message to Thor from his mother, Queen Frigga. Tell me, how have you fared since we met last?’

‘I’ve been excellent,’ Darcy said, patting him on the shoulder, ‘I moved in with these guys and I don’t even have to pay rent. How are the kids? Still causing trouble?’

Volstagg laughed heartily. ‘Indeed, as children are wont to do,’ he said, releasing her from his embrace, though he kept one arm slung over her shoulders. ‘Gunnar is growing like a weed! Soon he will be taller than you, though that is not difficult.’

Darcy giggled and jabbed him in the ribs. Behind her, Clint and Tony were raising their eyebrows at each other. Tony was also gesturing wildly and incoherently. Bruce, on the other hand, was standing quietly, observing the interaction.

‘This is all very touching, but can we go inside?’ Natasha asked, ‘You know, where the wind isn’t?’

Volstagg gave another hearty laugh and followed Darcy inside, where she waved him toward the couch.

‘Make yourself at home, man,’ she said.

‘Are you actually aware that this is my house?’ Tony asked her.

Volstagg grabbed him in a bear hug before Darcy could respond. ‘I thank you for your generous hospitality,’ he said, way too loudly to be speaking directly into Tony’s ear.

‘Dude!’ she objected, ‘Volume! We are not in one of your giant feast hall places. We can hear you perfectly well.’

‘My apologies,’ Volstagg said at a more reasonable volume, ‘I forget that your world is quieter than that to which I am accustomed to. I will endeavour to remember this.’

‘My ears appreciate it,’ Tony grumbled.

‘Alright, Asgardian Wrangler,’ Clint said, slapping Darcy on the shoulder, ‘Come help me grab some snack food. I figure the least we can do is entertain your friend here while he waits for Thor.’

‘Ah!’ Volstagg cried, then he paused and considered his volume, ‘A feast! My thanks,’ he said.

Darcy patted him on the shoulder and followed Clint into the kitchen.

‘So I’m the Asgardian Wrangler?’ she said, bumping her hip against Clint’s.

‘Apparently,’ he replied, grinning. ‘Dude, you just kind of _get_ people, even people from another planet; it makes you good at defusing weird situations. Or causing them. You’re a tiny force of chaos that we should all fear. But you’re good at this shit. I don’t even get other humans, so props to you.’

‘You’re not that bad,’ she said, bumping his shoulder again, ‘You just kinda switch off when you’re at home and stop paying attention to people. None of us care, dude. You do you. Also,’ she said, frowning into a cupboard, ‘Have you seen the popcorn? Don’t tell me Steve ate it all?’

‘It’s cool, I hid some,’ Clint said, opening another cupboard to show her his hidden stash. ‘I’ve had one too many incidents of needing a midnight snack and finding my favourites have all been eaten.’

‘Smart man,’ Darcy said, patting him on the shoulder and grabbing a few bags of popcorn to shove in the microwave.

‘You gotta tell me though, are Volstagg’s hugs better than Thor’s?’ Clint asked. ‘I won’t tell; I just need to know.’

Darcy laughed and shook her head. ‘You’ll have to find that out for yourself,’ she said with a wink.

* * *

_Frigga_

Darcy took a sip of her margarita, watching Jane fumble her way through answering Frigga’s questions. The spa had definitely been a good idea. Meeting your boyfriend’s parents was hard enough for regular people; having gods for future in-laws (maybe) had to be intimidating as _hell_.

‘Ooh, tell her about your research!’ Darcy said, poking Jane’s arm. ‘Thor said she’d be able to explain more about the rainbow bridge.’

Jane glared at her a little. Honestly, she should probably be more relaxed, what with the warm soak for her feet and the fact that she was currently getting her hands massaged.

‘I’ve been working on furthering our understanding of Einstein-Rosen Bridges,’ she said to Frigga. Darcy smiled in encouragement. After a few slow sentences as Jane tried to feel out what she wanted to say, her scientific enthusiasm overtook her.

It was good to see her relax a little, and Frigga nodded along encouragingly, asking a few clarifying questions, and noting that Jane’s understanding of the subject was impressive. The two chatted amiably for a while, and Darcy took the opportunity to finish off her margarita, enjoying the pedicure she was getting. So she was, understandably, a little startled when Frigga addressed her all of a sudden.

‘And yourself, Darcy?’ Frigga asked. ‘How are your studies going?’

She wrinkled her nose automatically.

‘They’re not awful or anything, but I don’t know, some of my current topics are a little uninspiring. My thesis advisor keeps suggesting things that have already been analysed to death. They’re not unimportant or anything, just… tired, you know? Sometimes I wonder if he thinks I couldn’t cope with producing a fresh analysis of a relatively new topic,’ she complained.

‘That is unfortunate,’ Frigga said, taking a sip of the mimosa she’d been handed. Her glass was half-empty already, so apparently she was enjoying it. ‘A brilliant mind should always be engaged, especially in your studies. To waste talent on something you have no passion for is a terrible thing. Do you have any topics in mind that you would wish to pursue?’

Darcy hummed a little as she thought. She had several ideas of course, but she wanted to phrase them properly. She wasn’t prone to anxiety in the face of important people, but she also wanted Frigga to take her seriously, at least in this.

‘I’d had a couple of thoughts,’ she said. ‘There’s the Suez Canal Crisis. It was widely written about at the time, but it sort of fell out of the public consciousness. I’m interested in how that happened and why, given it was such a major turning point. There’s also the AIDS crisis and the American government’s non response and then how that feeds into modern LGBTQ policies. There’s some literature on the subject but a lot of it doesn’t come from the most sympathetic places and much of it doesn’t deal well with the current ramifications. And, of course,’ she added, ‘There’s the implications of meeting Thor, yourself and the other Asgardians and how we deal with interplanetary politics when the situation on Earth is so disparate among nations.’

Frigga nodded thoughtfully. ‘Those all sound like very worthy topics,’ she said, ‘Though I admit that I am not acquainted with the events referenced for the first two. I must say, I hadn’t considered that you might write on the matter of interplanetary politics. I know that first contact with new planets is always an interesting time, often tense and fraught with misunderstandings and attempts at power-grabbing. If you do choose to write on the subject, I would be happy to discuss Asgardian political history with you, or provide readings on the subject.’

Darcy may have squealed a little bit at that.

‘You’d really do that for me?’ she asked, only a little breathless.

She’d been planning her thesis around that very topic ever since she’d met Thor the first time, but she’d never hoped to have access to such an awesome stock of sources as Frigga would be able to provide.

‘That’s incredibly generous of you,’ Jane said, staring at Darcy with something akin to shock.

Frigga smiled gently at her. ‘You’re both invited to visit me in Asgard whenever you please,’ she said. ‘Heimdall will be sure to keep an ear out. I know Thor has been looking forward to showing you the gardens, but he worries that he will overwhelm you, or that you will think he is moving far too quickly. I know he was very nervous about today.’

‘He always seems to forget that you were chasing an almost-hurricane in a rickety old van when he met you, doesn’t he?’ Darcy giggled, elbowing Jane lightly.

Jane nodded, ‘He’s such a dear, but I’m a little harder to scare than that.’

‘He’ll get over it,’ Frigga said, nodding sagely, ‘He’s not had much cause to consort with mortals recently and he forgets how very sturdy you can be. Now, what’s this about chasing hurricanes?’

Jane laughed a little, taking a long drink before answering. ‘I’ve been researching Einstein-Rosen bridges,’ she said, ‘What better way to do it than actually _catch_ one?’

‘I signed on to work with a crazy person,’ Darcy said drily. ‘But yeah, we saw a storm, and Jane thought it would be a great idea to go running toward it. Then she ran over a guy and we had a whole other set of problems.’

‘ _Darcy_!’ Jane squawked. ‘Why would you mention that?’

‘Oh this _does_ sound interesting!’ Figga giggled, picking up a fresh mimosa that had been quietly placed next to her while they were talking.

‘Oh yeah,’ Darcy said, grabbing a mimosa of her own. ‘We ran over a guy, and when we got out to check on him, it’s some giant blonde guy yelling about Odin or something, so I tasered him. I don’t even feel bad.’

Jane shook her head. ‘Oh my god,’ she groaned. ‘Do we really have to tell my boyfriend’s _mother_ about how we knocked him out the first time we met him?’

‘Yes,’ Darcy said primly, turning to continue the story.

* * *

It was late by the time they made it back to the Tower. They were both incredibly relaxed and very giggly. Jane followed Darcy into her suite when the elevator arrived and began stripping out of her clothes. Darcy threw one of her baggy sleeping t-shirts at her.

‘Did you have a good time today?’ she asked as she swayed, trying to reach down and pull her socks off. Jane wasn’t much better, having sat down on the bed and seemingly stalled out.

‘Hm?’ Jane took a second to process the question. ‘Today was good. I like spa days. I think we should do this all the time. But Frigga has to come too. She’s great.’

Darcy giggled. ‘I think you had a few too many cocktails,’ she sing-songed. ‘I may have also had too many cocktails.’

‘Many cocktails,’ Jane nodded. ‘Many, many cocktails.’

Darcy finally got herself into her own pyjama top and took Jane’s out of her hands and pulled it over her head. Jane scrunched her nose and stuck her tongue out when she emerged, looking very rumpled.

‘Bed time, Boss Lady,’ Darcy giggled, flopping down and wriggling until she was vaguely covered with duvet.

‘Hm, I should let Thor know we made it home,’ Jane said sleepily, fumbling for her phone.

Darcy started giggling again while Jane tried to search her jeans for her cell phone. It was a surprisingly difficult maneuver when the jeans weren’t on her. Darcy knew that much from experience.

‘I can’t find it,’ Jane huffed. ‘Where’s my phone?’

‘If I may?’ JARVIS interrupted, volume low to avoid startling them, ‘Your phone is most likely in Miss Lewis’ bag, based on past patterns of behaviour. Also, I am capable of notifying Thor that you have returned safely, should you wish?’

Both women fell into a fit of giggles, suddenly remembering that JARVIS was available, making the search pointless.

‘Yeah, please do that, J,’ Darcy said.

‘I gave you my phone in the car,’ Jane said, leaning on Darcy’s shoulder. ‘Why do I never remember that I gave you my phone?’

‘Too much stuff in that big brain,’ Darcy quipped, still giggling a little.

‘Mmhmm,’ Jane murmured, reaching over and patting Darcy on the head. ‘Time for sleepies.’ She rolled over and did her best impression of a burrito. Darcy shrugged and snuggled in close, throwing an arm around Jane. It didn’t take long for her to start impersonating a chainsaw, and Darcy drifted off to the familiar sounds of Jane’s snores.


End file.
